In the name of location independence I first downshifted and then quit my desk job but, somehow, to this day I’m still in Rome. The emotional roller-coaster of being free to travel, of becoming enthusiastic about way too many projects, of meeting like-minded people on my way (falling in love, living in my own fantasy, falling off the unicorn, and reload), of being able to enjoy a walk in the sunshine while spring is blooming rather than dying in the cubicle…
… all that has been amazing, so amazing as to side-track me from the travel goal I quit that job for.
To be honest, all this fun I was indulging in was actually the perfect excuse to procrastinate the ‘reality test’: the moment when I will discover if I am actually sized for the life I’ve always dreamt about, if I have what it takes, if I will get published, if I will manage to start multiple new lives from scratch relying exclusively on my kaleidoscope but -most of all- if I will ever be able to park the unicorn and be pragmatic, learning how to take care not only of the blog but of my emotional self too.
Fearing failure, I transferred my insecurities from the reality-test level to a more frivolous one (he loves me, he loves me not, and reload), I pretended to be busy working at some editorial plans for my social media handles and I threw myself headlong into the Forgotten Project rather than pitching to travel editors (funny digression, at least as long as you are not the protagonist: I have had that cover letter in draft since I quit my job; in fact, that email ends with ‘I wish you a great 2016’).
I can’t avoid the challenge anymore. It still scares me, because it’s no longer something I am dreaming of, or writing about on this blog; now it’s about taking an actual plane, moving to an actual town where I don’t know anyone, finding an actual job and, above all, measuring myself against something I do care about. Now it’s real. Now I’ve got a one-way ticket to Bristol.
I don’t know what to expect from this experience. What I do know is that magic happens only when I step out from my comfort zone to pursue my vision and do something that scares me. I’ve always wondered what is beyond the routine, I’ve always sworn I won’t settle for anything less. And now it’s that moment in life again when I must risk something and push myself beyond (what I perceive as) my limits.
Because that’s where a happier me is waiting, that’s where I will find the next coloured object that will tumble inside my kaleidoscope and that’s where I will figure out if the life I’ve always dreamt about is going to happen.
Or, at least, that’s where I will find Banksy’s greatest murals ;-)
Do you have any Bristol tips? Don’t be shy and comment along! I’ve never been there before, so basically any kind of tip will be very helpful!
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